Maplewoods Mirror #5 (September 2006)

 

Welcome to those of you new to this newsletter.  As you’ll see, it’s eclectic—my own musings and issues of writing.

 

MY NIGHT WITH THE BEAUTIES OF NORCO

 

Los Angeles continues to astound me in its diversity of experience.  Last month, our niece, quiet, unassuming, shy, and sixteen, called to say she was in the Miss Norco Beauty Pageant, and could we come?  The only thing odder might be Bruce Springsteen calling to ask did I like his new album, and could we join him at Gus’s Barbecue in South Pasadena for ribs?

 

Our niece, I’ll call her Heather for this, is a great kid, just incredibly shy.  The few times we’ve been to restaurants with her, she could barely voice to the waitress what she wanted to eat out of fear she was doing something wrong.  When I heard she’d be in a beauty contest, questions that immediately sprang to my mind for her:

 

--In this contest, do you have to talk?

--Do you have to wear more than jeans and a t-shirt?

--Do you have to be in front of people?

 

The previous year, when she and her family moved to Norco, we did ask, “Norco?  Is that a corporation or a washing machine?”    Norco was first merely a nickname for a 14-square-mile area north of Corona.  It's far south on the I-15 in western Riverside County, and the town slogan is, "Horsetown USA."  Instead of bike paths, there are horse paths.  Many stores are done up like a new Old West town--the Wild West via Disney for middle-class folk.  Used Suburbans, weary horses.  (It’s hot down there.)

 

From the Internet I learned that in the late 1920s in Norco, a huge resort was built, the Norconian Club: 900-acres that had a huge lake, a casino, Olympic-sized pools, mineral baths, a golf course, a landing field, and more.  It was meant for an escape for movie stars, but eight months after it opened, the Great Depression slammed down, and the facility was abandoned.  The federal government came to own much of this resort, turning part of it in 1962 into a correctional facility for narcotics offenders.  Narco in Norco.

 

So Ann and I went to the Miss Norco Beauty Pageant, now in its 57th year.  It was at the Norco County Fair, a dusty few acres of land with hurricane fencing.   Add a few quick-build rides, a Ferris wheel, and a lot of food stands, including one for bacon-wrapped hot dogs, and you have the fairgrounds on a stick. 

 

The beauty contest was in the little outdoor arena where sheep shearing probably happened, too.  The front rows were reserved for visiting "royalty," girls who won other beauty contests.  I saw Miss Route 66, Miss County of Riverside, and Miss Inland Empire among others.  They all wore pink or blue gowns suitable for a cousin's wedding, and topped off with a crown as good as the 99-Cent Store sells.  A couple crowns had swans on them.  Next to me on the aluminum bench sat a woman who looked old enough to have been to all the previous fifty-six competitions.  “Have you been to many of these?” I asked her.

 

“Oh, yes,” she laughed, hitting the knee of her daughter in her fifties next to her.  “I like these,” said the old woman.  “In the early years, it was around a swimming pool.  I rather liked that.  There was a swimming suit competition then, too.  They did a way with that—what a shame.”

 

“What do they have now?” I asked.

 

“Sportswear,” she said as if it were a round chalky substance like Tums. 

 

It was near eight p.m. when the emcee, Mayor Kathy Azevedo, in khaki pants and a short-sleeved shirt handed out beautification awards.  I thought at first it had to do with the young women we were to see, but no, one award went to a gas station near the freeway that prettified itself.  I pictured a pyramid of old used tires being carted away.  A few other awards went to homes that, according to my elderly neighbor on the bench, got awards because they were eyesores before. 

 

The mayor announced, “We’re not like Corona, next to us, which has over 150,000 residents now.  We’re Horsetown USA.”  It made it sound as if Norco wouldn’t grow, but this was still Greater L.A.  Of course it’ll grow.   In a few years, horses will be replaced with horse statues and horse billboards and horse posters, making everyone feel as if horses were still around.  Maybe they’ll install a merry-go-round with great wooden horses.  Heck, I went to school in Hopkins, Minnesota, raspberry capital of America, long after the last raspberry farm left the county.  Hopkins still has a raspberry parade.  I know about these things.

 

After thanking a few sponsors, the mayor soon added, “Now you have to wait a little bit because I have to go get on my gown.  I’m in charge of the Miss Norco contest, too.”  I realized in that instant where Garrison Keillor got a lot of his patter for Prairie Home Companion.  He’d been to events like this.

 

The natives were getting restless.  People dashed out and returned with giant lemonades and hot dogs wrapped in bacon.  The royalty in the front were standing up, sitting down, standing up, as if they heard silent music.

 

The lights finally came on again onstage, and all sixteen contestants, young women whose ages ranged from sixteen to twenty-three, strode out through a giant silver horseshoe that featured the words, “Dreams Do Come True.”  The stage was otherwise blank, and the women pranced around to an Abba-like tune.  While it was hokey as heck, I was cheering.  There was our niece!  My, she’d grown taller in the last year, filled out, and her long naturally blond kinky hair shone like Rapunzel’s in the stage lights.

 

“What happened to her frumpy glasses?” I asked my wife.

 

“Contacts,” she said.

 

When the girls had to go change, the mayor talked about small improvements on Sixth Street.  “B&E Feed is lookin’ good—it’s America’s country store.”  Next came the sportwear showing.  All the girls wore the same thing: a black skirt with a large curtain-like blouse in either white or maroon, which hung loosely and lifelessly, apparent rejects from Project Runway.  Oddly, the teenage girls entering from the food court seemed to be drawing more attention, what with their skimpy halter-tops and short shorts and grinning boyfriends who looked like dogs with a found steak.

 

When each contestant had to speak, I became nervous.  Would Heather faint?  No.  She walked out assuredly in heels, dark pants and a red blouse and scanned the audience proudly.  She smiled grandly and began with a few phrases in German, showing off the language she was learning in high school.  She spoke affectionately of Norco and of her three younger siblings, and her quest for a good education. Her microphone cut out.  Oh, oh, I thought.  Was this sabotage?  She simply spoke louder, keeping her cool.  When and how did she become so eloquent and self-assured? 

 

My cell phone vibrated.  It was news of a friend having a gallstone attack and being rushed to the hospital—we’d have to leave early.  While we didn’t see the ending of the show, we left damn impressed.  While Heather did not go on to win the crown, I knew even before the outcome she'd won something far more valuable: an attitude that showed she could perform with grace under pressure.  And as Ann and I bounced out of the bumpy dirt parking lot, and I gazed at the moon rising over the hill, I thought, "Norco.  Not a bad place."

 

SKYLIGHT BOOKS

 

Ms. Kerry Slattery, owner of Skylight Books in Los Feliz (1818 N. Vermont Avenue, next to the movie theatre) agreed to meet me even though I had not arranged it.  I had, however, sent her my book with several of its reviews, and she remembered that when a sales clerk announced me.  I climbed the stairs to her office.  The skylight above her gave a gentle light and made her look angelic as she stood and shook my hand.  She was a little older than I and smiled.  “I’ve never seen a print-on-demand book as yours get so much attention,” she said.  “Congratulations to you.” 

 

“Thank you,” I said, and I explained how I’d been in publishing years ago.  I knew to hire an editor and book designer and not rush into print.  She offered a chair, reached over to a second desk where The Middle-Aged Man and the Sea rested and picked it up.  The reviews stuck out from it, and she glanced at them again.  “Impressive,” she said.  “Most books I get directly from authors have no reviews, and the authors expect me to arrange a big display for them and a book signing, and it just doesn’t work that way.”

 

“I haven’t wanted any book signings,” I said, “because I’ve been in stores where the author is signing and no one is there.  That’s so sad to me.  Unless you’re well known, people don’t come.”

 

“Exactly,” she said.  “You understand the book business.  This is a small neighborhood, and people don’t pour out for most signings.  They really need a reason to come.  Too many authors don’t realize this, and some get mad when I don’t agree to it.  They can also get mad if their book’s on a shelf, spine out—but we only have so much space near the book register.  Only so many books can be displayed.  The best way for display is when a sales clerk loves your book, and it goes into the ‘favorites’ area up front.”

 

She also said she feels that many full-serve print-on-demand companies such as Xlibris and PublishAmerica mislead, saying that by getting an ISBN number, the books can be in bookstores.  Yes, they can be special ordered by bookstores, but that only happens if a customer asks for it.  Some companies promise mailings to bookstores, so bookstores can stock the book.

 

“When I see an announcement from them,” she said, “it goes into the wastebasket.  There are so few good titles, and print-on-demand books cannot be returned.  Normally with my distributors, if a book seems interesting, I might take a chance and order a few copies.  If they don’t sell in three or four months, I can send them back for a refund.  I can’t do that with print-on-demand.  What I order, I have to keep.  You have to realize, too, that most books are on shelves, spine out.  It’s up to the customer to find them or a sales clerk to recommend them.”

 

I saw, too, that although book buying on the web, such as from Amazon.com and BN.com, is growing, it is the bookstores that make the biggest difference.  Traditional publishers understand this, which is why they have sales people and relationships with as many bookstores as they can.  They encourage bookstores to take a chance by taking books back if they don’t sell.  I can’t be going to each store across America individually as I was doing with Skylight.  There are 3,200 independent bookstores like Skylight—the breeding ground of literature.  (Down from 7,000 in the seventies.)  There are another 5,000 or so chain bookstores.

 

Pod Girl, the anonymous reviewer at PODdy Mouth where my book is still recommended, made a point after the Entertainment Weekly article came out that five of us were selling better than she was at Amazon (see http://tinyurl.com/kqt5v), but she continues to sell steadily through her publisher, Penguin, while we’re back in obscurity.  I’m not complaining but simply pointing out how the book business works.

 

Pod Girl, by the way, explains more of the POD/traditional publisher differences in a great interview at http://tinyurl.com/okjrl.  Read it if you’re contemplating taking the route I’ve gone. 

 

As I also explained to Kerry, I knew short story collections are similar to poetry collections: people stay away in droves.  Hence, for me, by going print-on-demand, my collection came out the way I wanted, and my short stories can remain in print for a long time.  When my novel, The Laughter and Sadness of Sex, comes out through a traditional publisher (no news yet), and assuming people find my novel, read it, and like it, they may discover my short stories.  This is my long-term plan.  Presently, I’m in awe of how much attention my collection has received so far—perhaps far more than if I’d gone with a small literary publisher out of Minnesota. 

 

Kerry said she’d like to carry my book—words I was hoping to hear—and she would start with three copies “to test the waters.”  Thus, those of you who live in Los Angeles, if you recommend my book to anyone, you can also say that Skylight Books in Los Feliz carries it—as does Barnes & Nobel in Pasadena and Borders in Valencia.  Skylight is also on the web at www.skylightbooks.com.

 

Thank you to all of you who have bought my book.  The book business is not one where most authors ever get rich.  Writers have to pursue it because they love the medium.

 

THE EASY ROAD TO SUCCESS (SIC)

 

Much about being a writer is about being rejected.  From day one.  The first stories you write aren’t quite right says your teacher or workshop.  You work hard at improving it and yourself.  Finally one day, after encouragement here and there and “the idea is good,” you write a story that people like.  You now try getting it published, and you receive back little sheets of paper no larger than a gum wrapper.  They say, “We regret that we are unable to use the enclosed material.  Thank you for giving us the opportunity to consider it.”

 

You send many stories out, trying different approaches in your cover letters, and, over time your receive many rejections back.  You feel as worthy as an amoeba.  At last someone accepts a story.  You are published.  You might repeat the process many times for several stories, collecting enough rejections to make a phone book for losers.  You also get the occasional acceptance, until you have a number of published stories.  Some people admire you.

 

At some point you move onto writing a book manuscript and seeking an agent, and you get many little slips of paper back in rejection.  One day someone says yes.  An agent likes your book, and offers you a contract.  She submits your manuscript to publishers, and she gets rejections on your behalf.  While rejections are like mosquitoes seeking your blood, an agent acts like Off! repellant.  The mosquitoes still come, but they don’t break through your skin.

 

Let’s say your manuscript gets published and you land a big publisher, and now it’s time for publicity.  Or let’s say it doesn’t get published, so you publish it yourself using a print-on-demand (POD) service, and now it’s time for publicity.

 

Whatever way you arrived at having a book, it’s time to shout about it to the world.  Publicity, too, is all about rejection.  If you write a press release or send out cheerful e-mails, most people won’t care.  Your missives dive into the trash. 

 

This story is about how my book of short stories, The Middle-Aged Man and the Sea, happened to be in Entertainment Weekly last month as one of five recommended books.  I heard about it when a fellow writer and friend wrote me, “Did you see your book cover and that fab notice about your book in Entertainment Weekly, the publication all writers would KILL to get into? They said your book was one of the few POD that were wonderful and they included this incredible rave blurb about it!!!  Go get it, print it out, and use it for your next book! This is so wonderful I am hyperventilating!”

 

It’s all about perseverance in the onslaught of rejection.  For my novel The Laughter and Sadness of Sex, I have an agent (who is getting rejections as I write.  Ah—another one has just come in.)  For my collection of short fiction, The Middle-Aged Man and the Sea, I decided to go POD because my stories would always be in print.  (To read more about why or why not go POD and what it’s about, read http://tinyurl.com/kkgz5)

 

When it comes to collections of short fiction, who buys them?  To quote Samuel Goldwyn, “They stayed away in droves.”  Nonetheless, I’m quixotic, and I decided to publish my short stories that were published over the years in literary journals.

 

For this collection, I needed publicity.  Publicity is really about sending yourself out there in little doses and seeing what sticks.  Inspired by Carolyn Howard-Johnson’s The Frugal Book Promoter, I wrote media releases and sent them out hoping to get requests for more information.  I sent my book unsolicited to reviewers at newspapers and heard nothing back.  One day, I opened the Los Angeles Times and saw my book reviewed, and quite favorably.  That made one review for thirty books I’d sent out—but it was an important review.  It was worth the cost of those thirty books. 

 

I also kept my eye open for places to send books or releases, and early in 2006, I read about a popular website called POD-dy Mouth, where an anonymous woman reviewed the best POD books she could find.  I contacted her, and she agreed to consider my book.  Three months later, I received an e-mail from her praising my book and saying it’s the first POD book of 2006 that she could recommend on her website.  She wrote an incredible review of it (which you can see at http://tinyurl.com/eo9ck).  It’s now September, and she’s considered hundreds of books more and can only recommend seven. 

 

Entertainment Weekly found her website (http://girlondemand.blogspot.com) and touted it as “Best of the Web” and highlighted five books she recommended.  Mine is one of the five.  Thus I was in Entertainment Weekly.

 

All it all, it’s about striving for quality, trying things from new angles after getting rejected, and seeing that magic sometimes happens.  If you can get rejected, you may find acceptance.

 

(Speaking about acceptance, thank you to Joyce Faulkner, who suggested the above article, and she ran it in her wonderful publication, Yarnspinners and Wordweavers, a newsletter on independent publishing.  You can see the latest issue of hers at www.redenginepress.com/Newsletter1.pdf.  If you’d like it e-mailed to you each month, send a note to Nate@redenginepress.com.)

 

HOW THE BOOK INDUSTRY WORKS

 

I stumbled onto a blog by the Publishing Contrarian that explains why some books take off more than others.  Basically, everything is a niche market now, and books that happen to be about a special group get found by those groups.  Go to: http://tinyurl.com/mdpd6

 

MIDWEST BOOK REVIEW

 

Last minute news: the Midwest Book Review in its September slate of reviews gave The Middle-Aged Man and the Sea a Small Book Watch Reviewer's Choice review.  It said in part, “Meeks' writing style is characterized by an ability to create identifiable characters that will hold a haunting familiarity for the reader, along with imaginative but realistic and original scenarios which play out succinctly in the short fiction format. The Middle-Aged Man & The Sea is highly recommended, highly entertaining, and highly rewarding reading.”  The Midwest Book Review uploaded the entire review onto Amazon.com, which you can read at http://tinyurl.com/re8o6.  Just scroll down beyond Grady Harp’s fabulous spotlight review. 

 

LINKS THAT DIDN’T WORK LAST MONTH

 

I heard from a number of people last month last a few of the links I posted didn’t work.  I learned that was because the link addresses were so long that when they went beyond one line, the line break caused the link not to work.  One reader (thank you Daniel Will-Harris—see his beautiful website, www.will-harris.com) told me about www.tinyurl.com. It’s a free site that takes long addresses and makes them short for you—perfect for emails as well as newsletters like this.

 

One link that didn’t work last month was the blog about the Entertainment Weekly article.  It’s now in this tiny url: http://tinyurl.com/fvscp.

 

TWO COLLEAGUES

 

Leaving CalArts after my Advanced Story for Animators class last week, I ran into Luis Alfaro, who had been a fellow artistic member and playwright in Playwrights Arena with me.  He teaches playwriting at CalArts in a graduate program in the School of Theater.  Luis’ play Electricidad, based on Sophocles’ Electra, was produced at the Mark Taper Forum in downtown Los Angeles last year, where he headed the Latino Theatre Lab, and before that I saw his play Bitter Homes and Gardens at Playwrights Arena.  He’s also been a recipient of a MacArthur genius grant.

 

A most charming and outgoing person, Luis told me he had been hired to adapt Jane Austen’s Sense and Sensibility to a modern Los Angeles setting.  He did so: a wealthy family living in San Marino loses all when the husband dies, and through a series of events, they end up living near low-rent downtown.  Huntington Drive is the link between the two.  I lived that link five years ago when my girlfriend, now my wife, Ann, lived in Temple City and I lived in Culver City.  The fastest way between the two places during rush hour was Huntington Drive.  The riches of San Marino to the varying fortunes of Lincoln Heights is only about five miles.  I was so stunned by the diversity of the drive, I had created a photo essay for myself.  There’s a ten-block stretch where the transition is most profound from rich to poor.

 

Luis’s script will start shooting next month, directed by Fina Torres (Leap of Love), and produced by the same company that brought us Garden State.

 

I also heard from fellow UCLA Extension instructor and humorist Brad Schreiber that he has a new book out, Stop the Show!  A History of Insane Incidents and Absurd Accidents in Theatre (Thunder’s Mouth Press, Sept. 2006 ISBN: 1560258209).  As he explains it, the book “revels in ruined lines, dangerous scenery, rude theatergoers, performers sabotaging each other and more--from the West End and Broadway to the lowliest amateur theater.”  One example is an April Fool's Day announcement in a Broadway theatre that claimed Glenn Close, Richard Dreyfus, and Gene Hackman all had understudies going on for them, which created a mass exodus from the theatre before the audience could learn it was a joke.

 

Bravo to Luis and Brad.